How to lose 15 pounds of ugly fat without cutting off your head

I read till nearly dawn and awoke late and slightly disoriented. Of course, I could still find my way to the computer ON button with my eyes half closed. A special gift, I suppose you could call it, and one that I think I might one day put to remunerative use.

This bit of Americana is the funniest but most disturbing thing I've ever woken up to since my first nocturnal emission more than forty years ago.

(Lid dip to Baz 'I Was a Lardass Till I Found the Lord of the Dance' le Tuff.)

Categories: usa, television, advertising